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Iw1nCashFlow

Iw1nCashFlow

Joined
Nov 16, 2021
Messages
4,939
A woman is walking home with her 3 daughters - Rose, Lily, and Cinderblock

Rose asks her mother, Mom why did you name me Rose ?

To which her mom replies, Well sweetie, when we were coming home from the hospital with you a rose fell on your head .

Lily, curious now, asks her mother, Mom , why did you name me after a flower too ?

To which her mother replies, Well sweetie, when we were coming home from the hospital
with you a lily fell on your head!!

Cinderblock says to her mother, hghghdnbgh!!?? Dnbgh!??!
 

DiggityDaggityDo

DiggityDaggityDo

Joined
Oct 30, 2021
Messages
19,867
A sadist, necrophiliac, pyromaniac, zoophiliac, and a masochist were sitting in a jail cell together. The zoophiliac says, "I want to have sex with a cat." The sadist says, "I want to torture a cat then have sex with it." The pyromaniac says, "I wanna torture the cat, set it on fire, then have sex with it." The necrophiliac says, "Well I want to torture the cat, set it on fire, have sex with it, then kill it and have sex with it again." Finally, the masochist says, "Meow."
 

BMR Genie

BMR Genie

Joined
Jun 16, 2016
Messages
23,601
This Rich Woman Thought She Had The Perfect Husband. But Then He Said This.

Several men were in the locker room of the gym when a cell phone on a bench rang and a man put it on speaker and begins to talk. Everyone else in the room stopped to listen.
MAN: "Hello!"

WOMAN: "Hi Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?"

MAN:” Yes”

WOMAN: "I'm at the shops now and found this beautiful leather coat. It's only $2,000: Is it OK If I buy it?"

MAN: “Sure, go ahead if you like it that much.“

WOMAN: "I also stopped by the Lexus dealership and saw the new models. I saw one I really liked."

MAN: "How much?"

WOMAN $90000

MAN: "OK, but for that price I want it with all the
options."

WOMAN: "Great! Oh, and one more thing. I was just talking to Janie and found out that the house I wanted last year is back on the market. They're asking $930,000 for It."

MAN: "Well, then go ahead and make an offer of $900,000. They'll probably take it. if not, we can go the extra eighty-thousand if it's what you really want."

WOMAN: "OK. I'll see you later! I love you so much!"

MAN: “Bye! I love you, too."

The man hung up. The other men in the locker room were staring at him in astonishment, mouths wide open.

He turned and asked, "Anyone know whose phone this is?”
 
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